COMPLETE CHILD CARE
Article of the week : Emotional Attachment
By Dr. Paul Gonsalves, London (UK)
By Dr. Paul Gonsalves, London (UK)
The first years of life is when this groundwork is laid, and a strong, healthy attachment is the key.
Looking at your baby promotes attachment, of course, but it also helps him develop his own sense of identity. When you gaze into his eyes during a feeding, there is prolonged, intimate contact coupled with the warmth of being nestled in your arms, and skin-to-skin contact if you are nursing. When you change sides you offer him a different view of you and help him develop both sides of his brain and body.
Kissing is an intimate activity and a sign of affection that can help promote attachment. The kiss of most parents is even known to “cure” a whole host of ailments and boo-boos.
Again, the skin-to-skin contact here is elemental toward developing attachment and it’s a routine that provides stability and builds trust between you and your baby. It’s not necessary to bathe with him each and every time, but it’s a fun time for you and your baby to share together.
Again, the skin-to-skin contact here is elemental toward developing attachment and it’s a routine that provides stability and builds trust between you and your baby. It’s not necessary to bathe with him each and every time, but it’s a fun time for you and your baby to share together.
Each baby has his own set of cues, but many are universal. Babies will begin rooting, mouthing their hands or making sucking sounds when hungry and will eventually cry, for example. In time you will learn what all your child’s signals are if you pay close attention to what’s going on before the diaper change, feeding, nap or bedtime. When you have an attachment to someone, it is because you are close to them and you know them. You know when your best friend is feeling down and you know how to make her feel better. You know what your significant other’s favorite food is and you probably know just when to cook it to make him or her feel comforted. The same holds true with your baby. When you know your baby and respond to his cues, you build trust and a sense of security that all his needs are going to be met and anxiety is lessened and often eliminated. You don’t have to run at break-neck speed the instant your baby starts to make hungry sucking noises, but that’s a good time to respond verbally and let him know that food is coming. That response lets him know you are aware of his needs and that “help is on the way.” It also gives you time to gather a glass of water or a snack before nursing or allows you to prepare a bottle before his cue turns into a desperate demand.
And one last tip — ignore anyone who says you are spoiling your baby. You’ll be able to prove them wrong when your child is secure enough in your love to venture out on his own to explore the world.
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